No. 1 Behavior Perceived as 'Possessive' in Relationships is 'Trying to Prohibit Contact with the Opposite Sex' | Approximately 40% Have Broken Up Due to Possessiveness (According to Happy Mail Survey)
Happy Mail, a dating app, conducted a survey on 'possessiveness in relationships' among 200 adults with dating experience. The top behavior perceived as possessive was 'trying to prohibit contact with the opposite sex' (65.50%). While 42.00% found possessiveness 'not very desirable,' 36.50% found mild possessiveness 'somewhat welcome,' and about 40% had broken up due to it.
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- 📰 Published: April 21, 2026 at 19:32
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Ibec Co., Ltd. (Headquarters: Fukuoka City, Fukuoka Prefecture), which operates "Happy Mail (Happy)" (https://happymail.co.jp/), a dating and romance matching app/service with a cumulative membership of 35 million (※1), conducted a survey on "possessiveness in relationships" targeting 200 adult men and women (100 men and 100 women) with dating experience.
※1: As of June 2024
This survey compiled the results regarding:
● What kind of behavior from a partner is perceived as "possessiveness"
● How possessiveness from a partner is received
● Whether they have experienced a breakup due to possessiveness
This release presents the findings based on the responses of 200 adult men and women with dating experience, revealing behaviors often perceived as "possessive" in relationships and the realities that lead to relationship deterioration.
▼Special Survey Results Page
https://happymail.co.jp/happylife/questionnaire/sokubaku-meaning/
1. 92.50% Associate 'Possessiveness' with 'Romance'
When 200 adult men and women with dating experience were asked "What situation comes to mind when you hear 'possessiveness'?", "Romance" was the overwhelming majority at 185 people (92.50%).
[Breakdown (Number of people / Percentage)]
● Romance: 185 people (92.50%)
● Business: 8 people (4.00%)
● Family: 6 people (3.00%)
● Friendships: 1 person (0.50%)
[By Gender (100 people each)]
● Men
○ Romance: 89 people (89.00%)
○ Business: 7 people (7.00%)
○ Family: 3 people (3.00%)
○ Friendships: 1 person (1.00%)
● Women
○ Romance: 96 people (96.00%)
○ Business: 1 person (1.00%)
○ Family: 3 people (3.00%)
○ Friendships: 0 people (0.00%)
"Romance" was the most common for both genders, and especially for women, with 96.00% associating it with romance, indicating that the word "possessiveness" is strongly recognized in the context of romantic relationships.
2. Top Behavior Perceived as Possessive in Relationships is 'Trying to Prohibit Contact with the Opposite Sex'
When 200 adult men and women with dating experience were asked "What kind of behavior from your partner makes you feel 'controlled'? (multiple answers allowed)", the most common was "trying to prohibit contact with people of the opposite sex" at 131 people (65.50%).
[Breakdown (Number of people / Percentage)] (n=200)
● Trying to prohibit contact with people of the opposite sex: 131 people (65.50%)
● Wanting to know all of their partner's schedule: 124 people (62.00%)
● Constantly suspecting infidelity: 90 people (45.00%)
● Disliking their partner going out with friends: 85 people (42.50%)
● Trying to look at their smartphone: 80 people (40.00%)
● Checking SNS posts and followers: 76 people (38.00%)
● Becoming displeased if LINE replies are slow: 66 people (33.00%)
● Always wanting to be together: 64 people (32.00%)
Behaviors that restrict a partner's social life and actions dominated the top rankings, showing a tendency for actions that make one feel "freedom is taken away" to be perceived as possessive.
3. 'Not Very Desirable' is the Most Common Impression of Possessiveness from a Partner (42.00%)
When asked about their impression of possessiveness from a partner, the most common response was "not very desirable" at 84 people (42.00%).
[Breakdown (Number of people / Percentage)]
● Feeling loved: 11 people (5.50%)
● Somewhat welcome if mild: 73 people (36.50%)
● Not very desirable: 84 people (42.00%)
● Absolutely do not want it: 32 people (16.00%)
[By Gender (100 people each)]
● Men
○ Feeling loved: 6 people (6.00%)
○ Somewhat welcome if mild: 42 people (42.00%)
○ Not very desirable: 43 people (43.00%)
○ Absolutely do not want it: 9 people (9.00%)
● Women
○ Feeling loved: 5 people (5.00%)
○ Somewhat welcome if mild: 31 people (31.00%)
○ Not very desirable: 41 people (41.00%)
○ Absolutely do not want it: 23 people (23.00%)
Combining "not very desirable" and "absolutely do not want it" totals 58.00%, indicating that a majority have a negative perception of possessiveness from a partner.
On the other hand, "somewhat welcome if mild" also accounted for 36.50%, showing that a certain number of people perceive mild possessiveness as a form of affection.
Furthermore, looking at the breakdown by gender, 23.00% of women responded "absolutely do not want it", which is higher than men.
※1: As of June 2024
This survey compiled the results regarding:
● What kind of behavior from a partner is perceived as "possessiveness"
● How possessiveness from a partner is received
● Whether they have experienced a breakup due to possessiveness
This release presents the findings based on the responses of 200 adult men and women with dating experience, revealing behaviors often perceived as "possessive" in relationships and the realities that lead to relationship deterioration.
▼Special Survey Results Page
https://happymail.co.jp/happylife/questionnaire/sokubaku-meaning/
1. 92.50% Associate 'Possessiveness' with 'Romance'
When 200 adult men and women with dating experience were asked "What situation comes to mind when you hear 'possessiveness'?", "Romance" was the overwhelming majority at 185 people (92.50%).
[Breakdown (Number of people / Percentage)]
● Romance: 185 people (92.50%)
● Business: 8 people (4.00%)
● Family: 6 people (3.00%)
● Friendships: 1 person (0.50%)
[By Gender (100 people each)]
● Men
○ Romance: 89 people (89.00%)
○ Business: 7 people (7.00%)
○ Family: 3 people (3.00%)
○ Friendships: 1 person (1.00%)
● Women
○ Romance: 96 people (96.00%)
○ Business: 1 person (1.00%)
○ Family: 3 people (3.00%)
○ Friendships: 0 people (0.00%)
"Romance" was the most common for both genders, and especially for women, with 96.00% associating it with romance, indicating that the word "possessiveness" is strongly recognized in the context of romantic relationships.
2. Top Behavior Perceived as Possessive in Relationships is 'Trying to Prohibit Contact with the Opposite Sex'
When 200 adult men and women with dating experience were asked "What kind of behavior from your partner makes you feel 'controlled'? (multiple answers allowed)", the most common was "trying to prohibit contact with people of the opposite sex" at 131 people (65.50%).
[Breakdown (Number of people / Percentage)] (n=200)
● Trying to prohibit contact with people of the opposite sex: 131 people (65.50%)
● Wanting to know all of their partner's schedule: 124 people (62.00%)
● Constantly suspecting infidelity: 90 people (45.00%)
● Disliking their partner going out with friends: 85 people (42.50%)
● Trying to look at their smartphone: 80 people (40.00%)
● Checking SNS posts and followers: 76 people (38.00%)
● Becoming displeased if LINE replies are slow: 66 people (33.00%)
● Always wanting to be together: 64 people (32.00%)
Behaviors that restrict a partner's social life and actions dominated the top rankings, showing a tendency for actions that make one feel "freedom is taken away" to be perceived as possessive.
3. 'Not Very Desirable' is the Most Common Impression of Possessiveness from a Partner (42.00%)
When asked about their impression of possessiveness from a partner, the most common response was "not very desirable" at 84 people (42.00%).
[Breakdown (Number of people / Percentage)]
● Feeling loved: 11 people (5.50%)
● Somewhat welcome if mild: 73 people (36.50%)
● Not very desirable: 84 people (42.00%)
● Absolutely do not want it: 32 people (16.00%)
[By Gender (100 people each)]
● Men
○ Feeling loved: 6 people (6.00%)
○ Somewhat welcome if mild: 42 people (42.00%)
○ Not very desirable: 43 people (43.00%)
○ Absolutely do not want it: 9 people (9.00%)
● Women
○ Feeling loved: 5 people (5.00%)
○ Somewhat welcome if mild: 31 people (31.00%)
○ Not very desirable: 41 people (41.00%)
○ Absolutely do not want it: 23 people (23.00%)
Combining "not very desirable" and "absolutely do not want it" totals 58.00%, indicating that a majority have a negative perception of possessiveness from a partner.
On the other hand, "somewhat welcome if mild" also accounted for 36.50%, showing that a certain number of people perceive mild possessiveness as a form of affection.
Furthermore, looking at the breakdown by gender, 23.00% of women responded "absolutely do not want it", which is higher than men.